You Never Know
by KaseyM1113
Summary: Bella and Rose are studying abroad when they run into a certain prince and his friends. AH, canon pairings.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: So, the plot bunny attacked me one day sitting in traffic. The whole story's kind of funny, ask if you want to hear it. However, if would not leave me alone until I started writing it, so, I caved and it's been a lot of fun so far.**

**First and foremost, I need to thank Shae and Brie for prereading and generally just being awesome, and Cara for betaing for me. Without these wonderful ladies this chapter would be a mess! **

**Also, trust, not SM, don't own anything you recognize. I just like to play with them.**

**Enjoy!**

"Wow, I can't believe we're really here." Bella said, looking out the car window.

"Yes, Bella, you keep saying that. It doesn't change the fact that we really are here." said Rose, without even looking up from filing her already perfect nails.

"Rose, I know your entire purpose in life is ensuring everyone around you thinks you don't care about anything, and normally I love that about you," Bella started off sweetly, "but right now, I am trying to enjoy being in a new country for the first time. So, I swear to God, either keep the bitchiness to yourself, join me in my excitement, or get punched because the 'I don't give a shit' is getting on my last fucking nerve right now. Let me be excited, damnit!' she finished with a slight glare.

Raising one perfectly arched blond eyebrow, Rosalie looked at Bella and didn't say a word.

"Yeah, I know," said Bella bring a hand up to make air quotes with "You're 'significantly less than impressed with my tone.' I don't care right now."

"Whatever" came Rosalie's response, with a slight huff, as she tossed her long blond hair back over her shoulder.

Looking back out her window, Bella took in the sight of the beautiful city she found herself in. 'Studying abroad was definitely a good idea. This is going to be such a great semester' she thought to herself with a slight smile.

The girls were headed towards the apartment they were going to be living in the next semester. Possibly the next two if they decided they wanted to stay all year. The school they'd be attending did their study abroad program a little differently, and gave their international students the option to stay on a second semester if they so chose. The streets the were traveling were of that old time, well cared for state that you found in the truly magnificent old European cities. The buildings lining them were older than either girl dared guess, made predominantly of stone, and both girls found them utterly charming, not that Rosalie would ever have admitted that.

"I don't care what you say Rose," Bella said after a few minutes of awed silence on her part, and feigned bored silence on Rose's, "This city is absolutely gorgeous."

~YNK~

"Ok" Bella called from another room in the house Rose had yet to explore, "You have to admit Rose, this is a bit more than you were expecting for our apartment here."

Standing in the living room taking in her surroundings, Rosalie didn't respond. Standing by the doors to the porch as she was, Rosalie could see almost the whole living space because of the open floor plan. The living room had a large picture window on one wall, that caught the morning sun. On that same wall was a huge leather couch with matching chairs on either side angled into the corners. The wall across from it was dominated by the TV that was hung on it. Looking straight ahead she could see the dining room and beyond that the kitchen. Both were light and airy, with massive windows in the dining room, and sliding glass doors in the kitchen which lead out to a patio with a wrought iron table and chairs and potted plants everywhere.

"Well yeah, of course it's more. This is a freaking house, not the apartment we were told we'd be placed in." She shouted back, still looking around the room. "I can't believe this is campus housing Bella," she continued a few minutes later. "This place is gorgeous. There's just no way this is part of the dorms, it's way too nice. I keep expecting someone to come knocking on the door telling us this is the wrong place and we need to leave."

Poking her head around the corner of the door at the other end of the room, Bella gave Rosalie a quick grin and said "Well, then we better enjoy it while it lasts, hadn't we?"

"That's the kind of attitude I like to hear." a new voice said, floating towards them from the front hallway, which lead into the living room, and further into the house as a whole.

Bella shot Rosalie a furtive "who the fuck is that?" glance before leaning back out of the door to head up the hall towards the front door. "Hi, um ..." she started before stopping, not really knowing what to say.

Heading out the door near her towards the hall herself, Rosalie gave a soft sigh before saying "I suppose you're here to tell us that we were given the wrong address and this isn't really where we'll be living all year."

With a soft laugh and a slightly confused look on her face, the girl said "No, actually, I'm Alice. I'm the third girl that's going to be living here with you this year. And, oh God, I totally know what you mean about this not being where we're really going to live all year. It's completely amazing. I hope you don't mind that I did a bit of decorating before you arrived, I just couldn't seem to help myself." All of this came out a bit fast, so that it took a second before either Rosalie or Bella were able to comprehend it enough to respond coherently.

"Oh, uh, no that's fine?" said Bella looking slightly confused. "Wait, what? I'm sorry can you repeat that again slower?" and then without actually waiting for a reply continued. "You're Alice, our third housemate? I'm Bella and this is Rosalie. And whatever else you might be inclined to do or say, do not, under any circumstances, ever, call her Rosie."

With another spurt of laughter, Alice replied "Ok, great. After I did it I realized that I had roommates and I couldn't just randomly go about decorating without their input. I just got in the zone while I was setting up my room and it just sort of flowed out here into the halls, you know? Bella? Is that short for Isabella? Although, I'm sure you prefer Bella since that's how you just introduced yourself to me. Rosalie, hi. It's so nice to ... Wait" finally pausing to take a breath Alice realized what Bella had said last to her and looked back and forth between the brunette and the blond a few times and then questioned, "Why should I not call her that? Just so I know, I totally won't if you don't want me to though so don't worry. Can I call you Rose then, or do you prefer Rosalie?"

Arching an eyebrow at the small, fast-speaking girl in front of her, Rosalie finally spoke. "Damn you can talk. Where do you store all the oxygen for it, you're damned tiny? Yes, you can call me Rose, but only because I'm giving you permission to do so. The no to Rosie is because Rosie just screams of some Southern Belle, in her ridiculous, pastel colored debutante dress, and as you might have guessed, I am no one's idea of a debutante. Either that or some mid-to-late forties waitress working in some crap-tastic small town diner, which I am also clearly not. And yes, I am still pissed at my parents for saddling me with this idiotic name. Though I can at least admit that it's better than Jennifer, or Brittany, or one of those other overused 1980s girls names that would have just made things even worse for me in the stereotype department."

With a slight laugh, and a roll of her dark brown eyes, Bella told Alice, "As you see, this isn't a pet peeve of hers at all. In fact she's completely thrilled with it." with no small amount of sarcasm.

"Bite me, smart ass" was Rose's oh, so eloquent, reply.

"And she claims she's not a debutante? With such witty repartee I just don't see how she can't be. It just adds so nicely the already perfectly coiffed blond hair and lovely blue eyes." Alice laughed, with a slight smirk.

"Ya know what?" Rose said with a satisfied look on her face, "I think you and I are going to get along just fine Alice."

"Awesome. So, ladies, how do you feel about parties? Because I happen to know about what's supposed to be a 'hoppin' one not too far from here if you're interested?" Alice asked, looking between the girls to see what their faces would give away.

"Sounds good to me, and I've never known our little debu-not to turn down a chance to party." Came the answer from Bella. "So I propose, you let me and Rose get a bit more unpacking down Alice, and in say two-ish hours we'll all meet in the kitchen to grab something quick to eat before we head out. How's that sound to you two?"

"Fine with me." came Rose's reply as she turned to head to the stairs so she could find her party clothes.

"Sounds like perfection." chirped Alice. Then with a slight smile, "Hey Bella, not that I don't have complete faith in your ability to do your own hair and all, but, would you mind letting me do you hair tonight? I have this idea that could look totally awesome."

By way of answer, Bella gave her a skeptical look while running a hand through her long brown, slightly wavy hair, prompting Alice to reassure her, "Of course, you'd have total decision making power. So if you didn't like it we could change it. What do you think?"

Still with that same skeptical look on her face, Bella said "I have final veto power?" to which Alice shook her head vigorously. "Ok, sure. Worst case scenario here, we just tear it apart and start over." Bella acquiesced with a slight sigh.

"Lovely. Go find something cute to wear, and then meet me in my room after you shower. See you in a bit!"

~YNK~

From her position behind her, Alice was trying to explain her hair idea to Bella using nothing but her hands to attempt hold all her hair in the position she wanted it. "So, you see what I'm thinking? Most of it will be up like this, and this part will be twisted here and ..."

Out of nowhere, from the direction of Rose's room came what sounded like a loud growl, a door slam, and then someone stomping towards first Bella's room and then Alice's upon discovering Bella to not be in her own. Alice gave Bella a wide eyed look through the mirror and asked "Um, what exactly is about to come storming into my room? Should I prepare to do battle with some kind of wild animal? Perhaps the kracken? Do we know where Captain Jack and/or Davey Jones are?"

Laughing, Bella reassured her "No, that's just Rose. She's probably annoyed because she can't find just the right shade of eyeshadow to match her top and wants to pillage our makeup stashes in search of it. Don't worry it's nothing. Although if necessary, I think Captain Jack's brother, the Pirate King, Keith Richard's character? would be the safest way to tame the beast."

With those words, Bella turned towards the door expectantly with an amused look on her face. "She's predictable too. Watch. Three. Two. One ..."

"Isabella fucking Swan! I blame you for this!" Rose yelled from the doorway she had just blasted through.

Bella just raised her eyebrows at her, as if to say "Oh really?"

"Yes, don't give me that fucking face. If you hadn't decided that what was quite possibly the easiest breakup in the history of the whole damned world necessitated traveling halfway across the globe, to 'random-assed-European-country', I would not currently be searching for my favorite party heels. They would be right in my closet where they belong, not in some random fucking box somewhere in this house." Rose told her with no small amount of annoyance. "I swear, you and Embry were perfectly amiable. You still fucking are. It's not like it was the breakup from Hell or something. Then I'd at least get this insane urge to reinvent yourself, but God the only difference between you two now and two months ago is you've stopped having awkward sex with your best friend. So, YES, I do blame you. Now if you'll excuse me I need to go find shoes because someone can't be happy in her own damned country. You're just so ... ARGGGG!" With that, Rose stormed back in the direction of her own room to resume her search for said "party heels"

"Wow."

"Yeah. I know. Sorry, I really didn't see that coming. She always seemed perfectly excited and willing to come. I didn't know it upset her to be doing this." Bella said, sounding completely confused, and unsure of things.

"Um, so ... what ... um ..." confused sigh "I ... WHAT?" was all Alice could muster.

With a slightly amused look on her face, Bella said "I'm betting this has never happened before. A speechless Alice. I'm guessing you want to know what that was about?" Alice just nodded. "Um, Embry. Ex-boyfriend. We broke up during last semester. Things just weren't there anymore. We loved each other, but weren't in love anymore so we broke up." With a slight shrug, Bella looked back at Alice to see how she was taking this new information.

"Oh, hell fucking no." was the unexpected response she got from Alice. "If you think for two seconds that I'm going to except that Rose came barging in here all crazy blonde for that lame-ass bunch of bullshit you just spouted, you are seriously delusional. Try again, honey."

Blinking in shock at the militant tone of voice that accompanied that statement, Bella complied. "Well, ok yes there's a bit more to Rose's freak out, but that's really all there was to it you know. We were together for years. Since high school. But we realized that we'd gotten to a point where we were more best friends than anything else. So we talked about it, and agreed that we each deserved to be with someone who appreciated us and was in love with us, and, as Embry put it 'thought the sun rose and set by us." Yeah, I know, he was silly, but it was the sentiment. We weren't each other's everything anymore. And, like Rose said, the split was amicable. He's still my best friend. I called him when we landed to let him know we'd arrived safely." Bella told her, looking at her hands which were twisting in her lap.

"I understand all that. I mean that happens, it's not fun, but it happens. What I don't understand is why we just got raged at by Hippolyta, queen of the Amazons." was Alice's response. She had finally calmed down, and had started on Bella's hair, figuring the story would take a while and she might as well use it to get her hair done.

With an appreciative chuckle, Bella responded "No, Hippolyta is because after the breakup I decided I wanted to do something new. I'd always wanted to visit a foreign country, and studying abroad was the perfect answer. I wasn't in a relationship anymore so there was nothing stopping me from doing it. So I started getting information and planning and everything. Rose came home early from campus because she skipped out on lecture or something one day and I had pamphlets spread across our kitchen table trying to figure out where I wanted to go." Pausing to gather her thoughts, Bella glanced up at Alice's reflection, and Alice nodded for her to continue. Once her thoughts had cleared a bit, she continued "And, obviously, she demanded to know what all the stuff was. I told her, we've been best friends all our life. I was always going to tell her, I just wanted to wait until I had everything settled and could answer all her questions, you know. When I finished telling her, she asked where I was going, and I told her I wasn't sure. I was torn between coming here and going to Italy. Rose just thought for a minute and said Italy was a bad option since neither of us spoke a word of it and we should come here since English was the native language. I didn't even think to ask her, and she just decided she was coming. I mean obviously I'm so glad she's here with me, but I never would have asked her to come with me that would have been totally selfish of me. But, it is really nice to have a familiar face around in a situation like this. For all her rough and tumble, I don't give a fuck bullshit, she really is the greatest friend you could ever hope to have, you know. She's always been there for me. She's that friend who will drop anything and everything to be there for you when you need them." Bella finished with a small smile.

"Makes sense. I can see where you were coming from on all of it. And Rose seems like an amazing friend to just up and go across the globe with you just because it was something you wanted to do. Even with just the little bit I've talked to her and what you've just said, she really seems like the kind of friend you want in your corner." Alice said after a few minutes spent absorbing all this new information.

"Oh, that's not the only reason I came" came from the doorway. Looking back, Alice saw Rose was standing there, fully dressed, and had clearly been listening to at least her response. "I mean yes, I came because sister-friend over there wanted to, and I was not about to let her go gallivanting across the world after the end of that relationship, no matter how good it seemed to have worked out. But she wasn't the only one who's always wanted to travel. I figured, if she's going, I might as well join her. Have an epic adventure together. We'd always talked about doing this, and the timing made sense, so here we are."

Bella smiled back at Rose through the mirror, "I really was lucky that you were willing to let me sit with you that day in third grade since I had a Transformers lunchbox."

"Hey, all those other girls were running around with their Disney Princess pink bullshit. I knew a girl who had Optimus Prime on her lunch box wasn't going to be nearly as obnoxious as those little shits were." Rose said with a soft smile of her own. That smile then evolved into a smirk as she continued "Course I was only half right, but it was better than dealing with Jessica Stanley and Lauren Mallory. After all, beggars can't be choosers now can they?"

"Oh whatever, bitch. You know I'm the coolest girl you've ever met" was Bella's laughing response.

"Sure, whatever you say sweetheart. If that had any chance of being true it'd only be because I can't meet myself." Rose laughed. "Now, are you two ready to eat and get out of here, or am I going to have to leave without you?"


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Thanks go to Shae for helping me beat these reprobates into submission, and to Cara for her continued efforts in the war on commas! **

**Enjoy!**

"So, what are we doing tonight?" came from the large male sprawled across a leather chair. Although you couldn't see it at the moment, the young man in question possessed a wealth of dark curls, sparkling blue eyes, and a smile that could reduce a girl to mush from thirty yards.

"I don't know, why don't you do something useful and find us something to do instead of reading ..." was the beginning of the response from the annoyed young man seated across from him. "Fuck! What is that? The stock pages? Are you kidding me with this shit?" he finished, his tone quickly turning to one of disgust.

"Oh, calm down Ed. You know my dad will be all over my ass if I can't tell him how the DOW or NASSAQ or whatever the fuck he's into this week is doing when he asks," he answered without looking away from his newspaper.

"Ok, first of all, it's NASDAQ, not NASSAQ, moron. Second, call me that one more time Emmett and see what I do," Ed, or Edward as he much preferred, said narrowing his dark green eyes at his friend.

"You'll do the same thing you always do," Emmett told him, lowering the paper enough to give Edward a smirk before continuing. "You'll attempt to kick my ass and just as I'm about to pin your pansy-ass you'll scream for Jasper or someone to intervene, because heaven fucking forbid you should actually lose at something."

"Whatever, dude, I'm not the one who pouts when he loses," was his eloquent reply. "Besides," he added with a smirk of his own, while running a hand through his reddish brown hair, "just think of how upset the ladies would be if you did something to this face."

"Oh yes," said a third young man with blond hair and a mischievous look in his grey eyes, just then entering the room. "It would be a national catastrophe if something happened to your pretty face."

"I can think of a few girls who would probably sob if something happened to it," Emmett laughed. "I mean, what ever would happen if Backup lost some of his alleged beauty?"

"As long as we're on the subject of things you can cease calling me sooner rather than later, Backup can end any time now, thanks," Edward informed the two of them in general.

"Not likely," said Jasper, heading towards the side of the room where Edward kept his music. "And I have no idea what this shit emanating from your speakers is, but I'm changing it."

"Yeah, no dice Backup." Emmett agreed with a look on his face which implied Edward should have known better than to even suggest such a thing. "We have been calling you that since about the day we met, and I for one have absolutely no intention of stopping anytime soon. Guess you'll just have to deal with it. Your brother certainly deals with us calling him MVP a lot better. Considering he's next in line and all, I'd expect him to not be ok with it, but he is. Take a lesson there, Backup."

"Hey," Edward suddenly exclaimed sounding a bit disgruntled, not even acknowledging Emmett's reply to his plea, having just realized what he said before that. "Beauty implies femininity. You and I both know there is nothing feminine about me."

One side of Emmett's mouth kicked up ever so slightly as he pretended to study Edward's face. Then, with a full-fledged smile forming he said, "I don't know man, I mean you spend a disgusting amount of time on that hair of yours."

"And then of course there's the sheer quantity of clothing you possess," Jasper chimed in from his position at the side of the room.

"Oh, and shoes. Can't forget those. Or the amount of time he spends in front of a mirror in general," Emmett added, smile getting larger by the second. "And I mean, don't take this to mean anything because just ... no," he gave a small shudder with a look of disgust flashing across his face. "... but dude, you're kind of ... well ... pretty. Like, ok I heard some chick describing your looks as delicate. That's just weird, guys aren't supposed to be delicate."

"Whatever, you bitches are just jealous," Edward answered with a sneer.

Laughter burst forth from both his friends at this. Emmett was laughing too hard to form a coherent sentence and only managed "Jeal ... jealous? Of ..." before giving in completely to his hilarity and collapsing back against his chair in laughter.

Once Jasper had finally calmed down enough to speak he said "The day I am jealous of you, and because of your looks no less, is going to be one cold day, my friend, because Hell will officially have frozen over, I promise you."

Edward just rolled his eyes at his friends, then fished his phone out of his pocket where it had just started buzzing. Glancing at the screen he said "To get back to the matter at hand, that Mike kid just texted me about a party a few blocks from here. What do you say gentlemen? A night of boozing and babes sound good?"

Emmett and Jasper made noises of assent, while continuing to read the paper and search for better music than what was currently playing.

"Hello, assholes, get out of my room, I need to get dressed. We'll be leaving in an hour," Edward snapped after a full minute of them not moving from their respective locations.

"I think she's going to cry if we don't leave soon," Emmett said to Jasper just loud enough for Edward to hear as he pulled himself up out of his chair.

"Aye, aye, Cap'n," was Jasper's only response to Edward, though he did send a laughing smile towards Emmett for his comment.

~YNK~

"So, I know I probably should have mentioned this earlier when Backup was around too but ..." Emmett was saying to Jasper as they waited for Edward to finally join them. Taking a deep breath, as if stealing himself he continued, "Well, I wanted to run it by you first. You actually have a grasp on reality so your opinion is worth more."

"What's going on man?" Jasper asked, looking at Emmett curiously

"Well," Emmett began, before breaking off unsure of how to say what he was trying to tell Jasper. Rubbing the back of his neck with one hand, he looked away from Jasper trying to marshal his thoughts into some semblance of coherency. Finally, after a few minutes of thinking, he dropped his hand and started again.

"Ok, here's the thing. You know how I've always wanted to be a lawyer right? And my dad's always sworn he wouldn't pay for his son to do something like that?"

"Yeah," Jasper said, a quizzical look on his face, having no idea where Emmett could possibly be taking this. "It's always been something about if you want to serve the public you can go into politics or something along those lines, right?"

Nodding his head slightly, Emmett continued, "Yeah. Well, we were talking the other day, and he admitted that he understood me not wanting to just idle my life away and wanting to do something useful."

"That's huge man. He's seeing reason," Jasper interrupted, looking happy for his friend.

"Dude, compared to where the conversation ended, that's fucking nothing," Emmett told him with a slight smile kicking up one side of his lips. When Jasper raised his eyebrows at him he continued. "So, anyway, he tells me this and then goes on telling me that while he doesn't necessarily like the idea of his son going into the field of law, he'd be willing to compromise on it."

"Wait," Jasper interrupted again in shock, "Your dad said he was willing to compromise? I think this is one of the signs of the apocalypse or something. Since when is that word even in his vocabulary?"

"You're telling me. And no shit, I think someone bought him a word-a-day calendar or something and that's where he got it," Emmett said, shaking his head in his own amazement, chuckling softly. "So, I'm just staring at him, because ... well obviously. And he proceeds to tell me that if I'm willing to practice in the economics field in some way for the first five years after that I can do what I want to with it, and he'll pay for the whole thing." Pausing, and running a hand through his hair, he gives Jasper a stunned look, then continues. "I mean, I have no fucking clue what he wants me to do in the economics field. Be a contracts lawyer or work in the legal department at some brokerage firm or what, but hell, if it means he'll pay and I can do what I want to in the end, I'll do it. It has to be worth it, right?"

"Uh, yeah," Jasper responds as if it should be obvious. "Your dad agreeing to pay if you do that is massive. How could you not take him up on something like that? This calls for a serious celebration."

"I don't know," Emmett said looking wary, then quickly continuing at the look on Jasper's face. "I mean don't get me wrong. Definitely taking advantage of whatever the hell's gotten into my dad. But celebrating? Not tonight dude. I'd have to tell Backup and you know he's not going to get it. I can't answer all the questions he'll invariably have, and until I can, I'm not really in the mood to deal with his shit, you know?"

Studying him for a minute before giving him a look of sympathy, Jasper said, "Yeah, I guess that makes sense. We'll do something tomorrow without him though, because fuck if this doesn't deserve at least a little recognition."

Not saying a word, Emmett just nodded his agreement to Jasper while glancing back at the stairs, prompting Jasper to do the same.

"I still can't believe we lost that bet to Jane." Jasper said abruptly. "I mean we probably should have known he'd ultimately choose babes and booze, but he really seemed to be considering the house in the country."

"I know what you mean," Emmett said, responding as if they'd been talking about this all along. "I mean granted I thought he'd choose the beach house with all the half naked babes, but really we should have seen this coming. Then again," he continued with a hard look at Jasper, "if someone hadn't agreed to playing Barbies as Jane's prize it wouldn't be so bad."

"Yeah," Jasper said with a look of apology "Sorry 'bout that."

Jane was Edward's eight year old sister. After their parents had told Edward to pick one of the many royal residences to live in, he'd narrowed it to three. The one he chose, right in the heart of the city near the bars and theater and general nightlife, which was the one Jane believed he'd pick. One a short ways outside the city, which had lots of land and a fairly large stable, which Jasper thought he'd choose since it was still close to everything in the city but had the advantage of having his horses, which he loved despite not getting to ride as much as he might have. And, of course, the third house right on the beach. Being in a resort town, it had its fair share of nightlife, with the added advantage of girls in little clothing, causing Emmett to believe he'd choose that one in the end. Unfortunately for the boys, Jane knew her brother better than they realized, and had chosen the right house, and now they were going to have to play Barbies with her whenever she wanted for the next month.

"So, what happens now? Other than hammering shit out, I mean," Jasper asked, switching back to their previous conversation.

"Well, I have to look into schools, to start with," Emmett told him, thinking about what he needed to do in the near future. The fact that Jasper had jumped topics so randomly didn't bother him in the slightest as that was how they always were. Digressions were the bulk of their conversations and eventually they'd get back to their real point, even if it was a few days later.

"I thought you knew where you wanted to go though?" Jasper replied, his eyebrows slightly furrowed in confusion.

"Well yeah," Emmett said, shaking his head at the look on Jasper's face, "when I thought it would never happen and hadn't put serious thought into it. Now that it has a snowball's chance in hell of happening I need to look into different schools, decide if I want to stay here or go to somewhere like Oxford, or one of those uppity American schools like Harvard or Yale. Ya know, figure out shit like that."

"Mmm, true enough," Jasper conceded, looking down. Then, heading snapping back up to look at Emmett again, "Wait, do you really think you'll leave the country? And more to point, will he pay for you to do so?"

With a laugh on the inside at how well his friend knew his father, Emmett explained, "If it's Oxford, or one of the uppity American schools yeah, probably. If I told him I wanted to go anywhere else, probably not, no."

"Yeah, that does sound like him. Well let me know what happens and all. If you need help with shit, you know I'm available."

Emmett just gave him a smile in appreciation, then looked around the entrance hall let out a sigh and rolled his eyes.

"You think he's ever going to be ready?" Jasper asked after noticing Emmett's behavior with the faintest hint of exasperation in his voice at the fact that he was still waiting in Edward's entrance hall.

"He's worse than any girl I've ever dated, I swear," Emmett said with a touch of disgust. "Worst part of it is, at least with a woman you know the wait's going to be worth it. With Backup, pft it's just wasting time."

"I swear, the only reason I haven't tried to leave yet is because he's sneaky and didn't tell us where it was. Probably intentionally so we couldn't leave without his girly ass again," Jasper said, sounding a bit more annoyed.

"Yeah, well," Emmett responded with a slight snicker "I guess not even Backup is slow enough to not figure us out after all the times we've left his slow ass behind when he told us the location. He was bound to wise up eventually, right?"

Jasper let out a sigh and gave Emmett a rueful smile, saying, "Yeah, unfortunately for us. Wish it'd taken a little longer right now though. 'Making himself pretty for his adoring public' takes entirely more time than I care to waste here."

"Always has though. Come to think of it, if he hadn't taken so long getting ready that first night we went out back at school, he probably wouldn't have his much loved nickname," Emmett said with a slight chuckle.

"True." Jasper said with a laugh of his own. "The look on his face when you asked him if the reason he spent so much time on being pretty was so he'd have something to call his own since in all other respects he was just his brother's backup was priceless. It's quite possibly the funniest thing I've ever seen."

"Oh, God," Emmett said, chuckling lightly still, "just thinking about it makes me laugh to this day. Poor bastard didn't know whether to be offended or to laugh, I swear he was trying not to cry in front of us, and I'm pretty sure he's still shocked to this day that we were able to see straight through him with that little effort."

"It's moments like these, remembering the fun we used to have at Backup's expense, that I almost regret having to graduate," Jasper said with a slight sigh. Then, with a slow smile he added, "Think if I called and interrupted his beauty routine he'd just tell me in his desperation to get off the phone?"

"No, I don't think I would," Edward informed him with a dirty look as he came down the stairs to meet them. "Just what is your problem now?"

Jumping in to prevent Jasper saying anything to cause Edward's mood to further deteriorate, Emmett said, "Does it really matter? Can we just get the fuck out of here already? The girls aren't going to dance with themselves."

Turning away to head towards the door he threw over his shoulder with a wink, "Or do anything else for that matter. Let's go fellas, the night is young, and so are we."


	3. Chapter 3

**Ok, I am so sorry for the ridiculously long wait for this. The good news though is that once tomorrow's final is done I have a month off from school, and therefore the wait for the next several chapters shouldn't be nearly as long.**

**Thanks go as always to Shae for pre-reading, and helping me beat the reprobates I write about into submission. And of course, helping me be coherent, and not sound like an idiot. Even more thanks go to my awesomesauce beta Cara, without whom this would probably just be one giant run on sentence with no commas.**

**Still not SM. I'm cool with it though, my Emmett's more fun I think.**

"Um, really Alice?" Rose asked, with a slight sneer on her face as she took in her surroundings.

"Okay, what the fuck is wrong now, Rose?" Alice snapped back at her, annoyance heavy in her voice.

"You brought us to a frat party," Rose told her, as if it should be obvious.

"Rose," Bella began soothingly, reaching out to put a hand on her arm. "It's not that bad. I mean sure I'm not sitting on that couch anytime soon, but that kind of shit's expected at any party involving copious amounts of booze."

Looking towards the couch in question, Rose's sneer only grew. From their position in the corner, the girls had a rather clearer view than they would have liked of the couple engaging in a fairly enthusiastic make out session. As far as any of them could tell, without an intervention in the reasonably near future, it was entirely possible that someday in the future the couple would be telling their child it had been conceived right there on that very spot.

"Bella, I for one have zero desire to watch those two procreate. In fact, I hope they never do," Rose said matter-of-factly. "God, why can't I look away?" she burst out after another minute. "It's like a fucking train wreck. No matter how hard you might try, you just can't stop starring. Mother fucker."

Not bothering to respond verbally, Alice looked around her. _At least I have other people's clothing choices to distract me_, Alice thought. All around her people were wearing what could only be described as the first things they found in their closet without bothering to turn the light on. There were a couple of girls grinding on the dance floor. One in a turquoise colored blazer, with shoulder pads, _where do you even find something that atrocious?_, the other in what would have been a cute outfit of a fitted black minidress and hot red stilettos, had it not been for the electric blue boyfriend sweater she'd put over it. _They would arrive together, they're the only people in the world who think their outfits actually look good._ There were the standard tiny dresses and skirts with tops that barely covered anything; and jeans and a tee-shirt with a design on it or an open button down over a solid colored undershirt. _Why can no one ever come up with something original that doesn't look like it's out of Ringling Brothers. I mean really, how hard is this?_

"Check out spaz-attack by the bar," Bella said, nudging Rose and Alice and nodding in that direction. Directly in front of the bar, a beer in hand, stood an obviously dyed and spray tanned male type. "How has he not dumped that beer all over something yet with that dance/seizure combo he's rocking?" she continued derisively.

"This is why you bring Bella to parties," Rose told Alice with a wink. "She barely drinks anything, and she has some moral code against going home with guys, but damn if she doesn't provide some of the funniest commentary available."

"Yeah, that's why you party with me," Bella said with a short laugh, before taking a sip of her beer. To Alice, she said, "She parties with me because she knows I'll make sure her ass gets home in the same condition it left in. Someone has to keep her from going home with every guy that comes down the tubes."

"Whatever, bitch," Rose said glancing towards the door that had just opened to admit a couple of guys who were laughing amongst themselves about something one had said. "Holy shit," she said out of nowhere, still staring at the door.

"What?" Alice asked, looking at Rose out of the corner of one eye, while still internally critiquing everyone else's outfit choices.

"Did you see what just walked in?" Rose said, a note of awe to her voice.

Snickering, Bella raised an eyebrow at her and said, "I'll venture a guess that whatever it is, you think it's hot. And I'll venture a second guess that if I don't take that beer away from you now I'm going to have to try and stop your drunk ass from going home with it later."

"Shut the fuck up and look, Bella" Rose told her, still not looking away from the guys, who had now travelled to the bar and were greeting the guy Bella had previously declared "spaz-attack".

"Um, Alice?" Bella asked after looking where Rose indicated.

"Yeah?" was all Alice said, still entranced in fashion.

"Um, isn't that one of your princes?" Bella said, a slight frown forming in her eyes as she watched him wink at a passing girl who promptly started giggling like an idiot.

Finally glancing at what had so arrested her friends' attention, Alice confirmed Bella's suspicions. "Oh, yeah. That's Prince Edward. He's the second son. His older brother, Carlisle, is the Crown Prince, and he takes it pretty seriously. He obviously cares about the country, while Edward just parties his nights away."

"Who are his friends?" Rose asked, attempting to sound nonchalant about it and failing miserably.

"I assume they're Jasper and Emmett. They've been friends since they were in grammar school or something." Glancing at Rose to see if she was really listening, Alice smirked before continuing "The big dark haired one is Emmett, and the blond is Jasper. They're pretty serious, I hear. There's been talk of them going to America to get married."

"WHAT!" Rose screeched, getting wide eyed.

One look at her face and Alice started laughing so hard she had to lean on Bella to stay up. "Oh my God, Rose. I can't believe you fell for that," she said through her laughter. "Trust me they're straight. Between the three of them I don't think I could count high enough to tell you how many women they've slept with."

While Rose simply glared at Alice, waiting for her to calm down, Bella said, "That's disgusting. I swear the third one with the bronze hair that has either never seen a brush in its entire existence, or is being made to look that way through an excessive amount of styling product, has winked at everything with a vagina that has passed him since he got here."

Suddenly, as if he could feel her looking at him, the one in question looked up in their direction, making eye contact with Bella. As she was prone to doing at the slightest provocation, Bella blushed when she realized she'd been caught staring and immediately looked away, causing her to miss the smirk that lifted one side of his mouth.

YNK

"Here we are gentlemen," Edward could be heard saying as he, Emmett, and Jasper climbed out of a car in front of the party. "I know it doesn't look like much but Mike swears there's a bunch of babes and obviously he always provides lots of quality booze."

"Booze?" Emmett scoffed at him. "I know we've been saying 'babes and booze' for years, but listening to it spew from your mouth every twelve seconds suddenly has me feeling like we're on that ridiculous Jersey Shore show."

Jasper promptly burst out laughing at this, saying "Oh God, it really does feel like that. What's next, Backup? You going to start talking about GTLing it everyday?" as he walked through the door.

Edward merely glared at the two of them as Emmett and Jasper continued to laugh at his expense. _I swear if these two idiots went an entire fifteen minutes without mocking me it'd be a sure sign of the Apocalypse._ "As much fun as it is to listen to you two crack jokes at my expense, how about you both shut the fuck up already and we go find some drinks while we scope out the attendees?" Edward said, looking for all the world as if he hadn't actually been listening to what his friends were saying.

"Solid," Emmett said, while Jasper nodded, saying that Mike was at the bar and if they were quick about it they could say hi to him and ensure he didn't come looking for them later.

"Hey guys, you made it!" Mike yelled at them far more loudly than necessary given the less than five feet between them all. "I was starting to wonder if you weren't going to make it."

Emmett simply ignored the obnoxious blond man and continued looking around himself to see who was there, while Jasper gave a quick smile and turned to the bar to get them all drinks.

Edward gave a Mike a short smile, the lack of sincerity in the motion going completely unnoticed by the other man. Taking in Mike's appearance Edward couldn't help but think that it was probably for the best that he wasn't into dating, as his chances of attracting anyone worth having were low at best. "How could we not come Mike?" Edward finally said, clearly not meaning a word of it, "You throw some of the best parties around."

"At any rate, you always get the hottest chicks around at your parties, so you're not going to get rid of us anytime soon," Emmett told him, finally lowering himself to acknowledge their host. _God this guy is a joke. How he can continue to miss our overtly obvious disgust for him is beyond me._ While thinking this, Emmett's eyes continued to travel the room, and he caught Edward winking at some random girl passing him, and noted that as usual she immediately started giggling. _Hmph. Wonder if there's a single girl on this planet who doesn't consider Backup to be God's gift to women. If she does exist, I really hope I'm there to watch her shoot him down. That shit'll be epic._

"Ok guys," Jasper interrupted, before Mike could commandeer any more of their time, "I've got us drinks. Let's go ... mingle ... with the ladies." Then, nodding his head in acknowledgement of Mike, he and Emmett headed off, with Edward not too far behind them.

Settling themselves near a wall with a decent view of the room as a whole, they started their standard party behavior of picking out their marks for the night, while having their first drinks and comparing notes on what worked for them in the past.

"I don't know man," Jasper could be heard saying, "I mean sure that line worked for you last week, but it never has before and to be totally honest if that girl was any drunker she'd have needed her stomach pumped. I don't think it counts."

"The fuck you say," Edward responded, having none of Jasper's criticism. "It worked last time because I said it and I'm fucking awesome. It's never worked in the past because it was always that lame ass saying it."

"I'm the lame ass?" Emmett said, giving Edward the side-eye. "You're the one who actually tried to get a girl to go home with you using the line 'I know it's my legal title, but you don't have to call me Prince tonight.' Yeah, clearly you're the fucking cool one here. Ass."

"Before you two get into a pissing match over this, look at that," Jasper said out of nowhere, having noticed three girls standing on the opposite side of the room from them. "I think I'm going after the short one with the dark hair tonight."

"Wait, who are you talking about?" Edward asked, having not been paying attention as he had just noticed a dark haired girl of his own.

"The little one over there with the spiky hair," Jasper clarified, nodding his head in the direction of the girl in question.

"Hmm, she's cute but I think I like her friend with the dark hair better," Edward said, realizing the girls in question were actually two of three girls across the room.

"Holy shit," was all Emmett could get out.

"She's hot right?" Jasper said with a smirk. "But don't even think about snaking her, I saw her first."

"Not your brunette, dude," Emmett said. "Or yours, Backup. Do you see the third one? The leggy blond one with what appears to be an amazing fucking rack? Hello, nurse."

Pushing off from the wall Jasper said "Well, what do you guys say we go try our hand at wooing friends, gentlemen? This should be most interesting."

"Definitely," Edward said moving towards them as well, as Emmett, said "Right behind you," and made to follow them.


	4. Chapter 4

**Well, this one came a lot quicker than the previous ones. On that note, I think I'm going to stick with Tuesday for updating. I'm on break and it's working well so far. I'm expecting to be able to build Backup into my schedule once school starts back up.**

**Many thanks to Cara for continuing to battle the commas, and fix my "I'm a dumbass, I've been awake way too many hours to be writing fic" mistakes. She's a lifesaver! Just as many to Shae for reassuring me it wasn't shit, and for helping to keep me on task and coherent when writing about these monsters.**

**Disclaimer: still like _my _Emmett better than SM's**

"Oh my God, they're coming over here," Rose said out of nowhere, her eyes getting huge.

"What? Who are?" Bella asked, having not noticed the guys heading in their direction as she was studiously looking anywhere but where they had previously been standing.

"I believe the distraught blond is referring to the Prince and his friends," Alice said, watching Rose trying to surreptitiously fluff her hair a bit.

"Oh, fantastic. I really don't want to have to pry her off the one her ovaries are doing their mating dance for later," Bella said, sounding disgusted, and still doing her level best to not look in the direction the guys were coming from.

"Whatever, bitch. He's fucking hot, and I'm telling you, right now, completely fucking sober, if he tries to take me home with him, let him." Rose said, eyes still glued to the guy in question, while stressing the last two words. "Do you think he'll try? I mean, I look good and everything right?" she added with the barest hint of insecurity.

"Ok, first of all, you're hot. You know that. Stop looking for ego stroking, you don't need it," Bella told Rose, with a slight roll of her eyes. "Second, based on what Alice has already said, I'm pretty sure that due to your having a vagina he'll be interested and try and get you to go home with him. Also, if you want to be Sluterella for the evening, that's on you, but do not expect me to play your fairy godmother and come rescue your ass in the morning. If you're getting yourself into this, then you can damned well get yourself out of it too."

"Oh, my God, shut up! They're close enough to hear your mouth," Rose hissed at her, finally looking away long enough to give Bella a dirty look.

"I maintain, you have a vagina. He won't care. In fact, seeing as we all do, I doubt they're going to even hear what I'm saying while they're staring at our boobs," Bella informed Rose, sharing a look with Alice.

"Hi, there," said one of the guys as they had finally reached where the girls were standing. He had dirty blond hair with a slight wave to it and stormy grey eyes. The girls all smiled at him and said hi back.

Alice, after saying hi, started to look away, before quickly snapping her eyes back on him. After a beat of silence, she said, "My name's Alice, I'm not sure I know who you are, but I would love the chance to find out," with a coy smile on her face.

His smile growing a bit, the blond said, "Well, my name's Jasper. How about you and I go find ourselves some fresh drinks and do a little getting to know each other?"

Shooting a quick smile back to Bella and Rosalie, she quickly agreed, and taking the arm Jasper held out to her headed off to do exactly that.

"Wow, she's a bit easier than I thought," Bella said under her breath.

Having heard her, the other two guys chuckled. The bigger one, with the curly brown hair and deep blue eyes, said, "Well, Jasper has always been good at getting what he wants with women. Don't judge your friend too harshly."

Then turning his eyes to Rosalie, his lips quirked slightly at one side into a half smile, he said, "My name's Emmett, by the way. Sorry for Jasper's poor manners in not introducing himself to you ladies. This is Edward, and we seem to find ourselves quite enchanted with you lovely ladies."

Although he said this to both girls, his eyes had remained on Rosalie the whole time, prompting her to say, "I'm Rosalie, and this is Bella. I think we'll be able to find it somewhere deep down in our hearts to forgive your friend for his behavior," giving him a smile in return.

_Awesome, Sluterella's a twin. Didn't think Alice was really Tinker Hoe. The shortness should have clued me in probably,_ Bella thought derisively. Trying to keep the grimace off her face, she said to the boys, "Yes, well I suppose even the best of us will fall for a pretty boy with a good bit of charm every now and again, right?"

"Indeed," Emmett replied, still not having succeeded in looking anywhere other than directly at Rose. "We can't fault her being human."

"I certainly hope Jasper is the only one of you three with poor manners," Rose began, smiling up at Emmett from under her lashes. "You seem quite the charmer yourself, and I would hate to find that rude is a supporting character trait to charming."

"Oh, no. You'll find my mother raised me right. When it comes to lovely ladies such as yourself, you'll find I am the perfect gentleman," Emmett assured her with a wink.

"Only when the occasion calls for it though, right?" Rose said, her smile widening. "I can think of more than a few instances where one need not be a gentleman."

"Well, I think you'll find it comes and goes in such a way as to never leave you disappointed," he was quick to assure her, his smile holding a slight predatory hint. "What say you give me the opportunity to show you just how much of gentleman I can and can_not_ be?"

Her smile growing even larger at this overt display of his attraction for her, Rose responded, "I would love nothing more," before winking at Bella and heading off with Emmett.

"Well, looks like we're two for two tonight," Bella said mostly to herself, not expecting the third, Edward, to be able to hear her over the music playing.

Unfortunately, Bella had failed to realize just how close to her he was. "Hmm, that we are. Bella, was it?" She gave him a short nod, trying not to let her excessive dislike of the man before her show. "A beautiful name, for a beautiful woman." Hearing this her disgust just grew. "My name's Edward," he added, a poorly hidden smirk on his face.

"Yes, your friend said that," she responded shortly. Looking around them, she then asked "So, what do your friends' success rates look like? Because from where I'm standing, they're going to be hitting homers tonight."

"Homers?" Edward asked in confusion. "I'm not sure I'm familiar with that particular euphemism, but suffice it to say, we'll likely not be seeing our friends again tonight."

Looking the woman in front of him up and down, his smile grew. Finally looking at her face, on which he failed to notice the faintest signs of disgust, he said, "So, you new here? I've never seen you before, and I'd definitely remember a gorgeous woman like yourself," his smile turning suave at the end.

"Oh, my God, what?" Bella said, disbelief strong in her voice, and her eyebrows rapidly rising on her forehead.

"Well, a girl as lovely as you isn't something any man could forget easily. And I never forget a beautiful face, meaning you must have just moved into the area as I seem to be unfortunate enough to not have made your acquaintance before now." As he said this last bit he reached for her hand and raised it towards his lips, intending to kiss the back of it.

Realizing his intent, Bella ripped her hand out of his grasp saying, "Seriously? Does that crap actually work for you?" The disgust was now evident in her voice and on her face. Without waiting for a reply, she continued, "Yes, to answer your innuendo laden question, I am new here. However, I find it hard to believe you know every single, and possibly not so single, girl in this room. There's at least a hundred girls at this party. It's not possible."

"I didn't say I knew _every_ girl here, just the beautiful ones," he said, the smugness still high on his face. "Besides, what you seem to not be aware of is that I'm the prince. Consequently, I know all the important people, and gorgeous girls like yourself rank pretty high on my list of important people," again reaching for her hand, in a renewed attempt to kiss it.

Shoving both her hands in her pockets quickly, she gave him a derisive look, before informing him, "If you attempt to touch me one more time, I'm going to rip your hand off. Got it?"

The startled look on his face at this pronouncement made it quite clear her reaction was not the one he had been expecting. The fact was the response he usually received from women was more along the lines of melting into a puddle of gushing, giggling love-struck woman who was hoping quite desperately he would take her home with him.

Further throwing him off balance, Bella merely glared at Edward as she told him, "And, actually, I know who you are, I just don't care. So what, you're the prince. That doesn't say anything about the kind of person you are, which is far more important. You're just some spoiled rich kid, who gets everything and everyone he wants because of nothing more consequential than who his parents are. So you won the genetic lottery. What good does that do anyone? I know you're used to women throwing themselves at you or whatever, so this might come as a shock to you, but that's not going to happen this time. Hate to be the one to burst your bubble and all, but I'm not interested. I'm not going to be another of your many one night stands. I have no interest in being another notch on your bed post. So, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go be anywhere else doing any possible thing other than talking to you."

Throwing one last contemptuous look at him, Bella then turned on her heel and with her hair swinging behind her, proceeded to stalk across the room in an effort to put as much room between herself and Edward as possible.

Across the room, Emmett burst out laughing, having seen what just happened. At Rose's curious look, he explained, "I think your friend just shot Backup down cold."

Looking in the direction Emmett indicated, Rose started laughing herself upon seeing the shocked look and dropped jaw Edward was currently wearing, though a bit less hysterically than Emmett had. "Oh, God, he tried laying the charm on her didn't he? Too bad for him, my dear best friend has no tolerance for playboys. All his usual ploys would have blown up in his pretty face."

"Hmm, really?" Emmett asked her starting to smirk in his friends direction. At Rose's nod, he told her, "This is about to get very interesting then. Backup's not going to give up on her now that she's turned him down, and I expect that as long as he keeps using his standard tricks she's not going to give him the time of day."

"No, you're completely right. She's not going to," Rose told him, still laughing softly.

_Excellent. I'm so glad someone's finally going to be putting him in his place,_ Emmett thought, his smile growing.

YNK

Having reached the bar, Bella ordered a shot and another beer. After throwing the shot back, she turned to survey the room so as to ensure the man she had just insulted was not following her. Instead, she found a blond man looking at him calculatingly. Recognizing him as the same person she had previously named spaz attack, she gave him a slight smile of acknowledgment, before looking at the room at large.

Taking her smile as permission to approach her, the blond came over and introduced himself. "Hi, my name's Mike. I couldn't help noticing your interlude with the self-proclaimed bronze-haired god over there." At the scowl she threw at him, he quickly continued, "I must say, I'm rather impressed. I don't think I've ever seen him get shot down in all the time he's been coming to my parties. It was refreshing."

Looking back at him, with a less annoyed expression on her face, Bella said, "Well, in that case, my name's Bella. I didn't know this was your party, thanks for letting us gatecrash. I was having a lot of fun before I got interrupted just now."

"Oh, no problem, honey. The more the merrier," he told her with a smile. "You do know that that was one of our princes you shot down, right?" he then asked her.

"Oh, I do. I might be American, but I know who your princes are. I suspect the fact that I acknowledged knowing who he was, and informed him I didn't give the slightest fuck is what has his mouth gaping like that."

Eyes growing wide, and his respect for the woman before him growing, Mike said, "Oh honey, I wish I had been there to hear it. It would have been positively hilarious. As much as I like the guy, he's a pompous ass, and hearing him get put in his place is the only thing I could possibly enjoy more than getting to watch it."

Bella gave a small chuckle, then took a quick sip of her drink before informing him, "Well, I'm willing to bet a guy like him is going to keep trying, at least for a little while, so I'm pretty sure you'll get a chance to hear it."

"I am quite looking forward to it," Mike assured her, placing extra emphasis on quite.

Looking at him from the corner of her eye, Bella felt one corner of her mouth starting to kick up as she informed him, "Ya know, I think I'm going to like you."

With a short laugh at her forthrightness, Mike smiled back at her saying, "Yeah, I can be pretty likable when it suits me. So," he continued after a beat, "You said you're American? What brings you all the way to our humble little country?"

Quirking an eyebrow, Bella said "Nice transition there. I liked the complete lack of trying to hide it," getting nothing but a small smirk in reaction, she continued, "To make a long story short though, I've always wanted to travel a bit, studying abroad seemed like the best way to do it, and there's no time like the present, right?"

Mike gave her another of his calculating looks, before saying, "So, the breakup was mutual, although I'm thinking you instigated it. It was probably really easy, and you're also probably still best friends or whatever. And, since nothing's tying you to where you were you figured you'd do it now, before you chickened out. Did I miss anything?"

Eyes going a bit wide, Bella barely managed to keep her jaw from dropping as she stared at Mike, slightly in shock. The fact that he had just so easily summed up the reality of her decision to study abroad, when she had made no mention of anything to do with Embry, left her feeling slightly in left field. As far as she knew, she didn't give off any kind of fresh-from-a-breakup vibe, and while his reasons were the real ones she was in his country, the ones she gave were no less true because of it.

"Well," she finally managed to sputter after another moment of shocked staring, and a quick drink of her beer to rewet her suddenly as dry as the Sahara mouth, "No, I think you hit most of the key points. You forgot the actual best friend who loves me enough to come with me, when I never asked or even told her what I was thinking. Although, she's headed this way with the large piece of man meat she's found for herself, so I'll introduce you."

"The female best friend is always iffy for me," Mike said while glancing in the direction of the incoming blond and her aforementioned man meat. "Sometimes they're gung-ho, totally willing to go along for the adventure, or at least behind you going a hundred percent, and then other times they're evil and resentful that you're leaving them for a few months to do something important to you. Obviously she went the former route with it." Then looking at Rose more critically, he added, "She's pretty. Definitely Emmett's type too. I can see why he likes her. Intriguingly, she looks like she might have just enough fire to actually put his ass in line and keep it there."

"I take it that's a good thing and you approve?" Bella asked him, raising an eyebrow at him.

"Oh, yes, definitely," Mike was quick to reassure her. "I must say, all in all, I think you Americans are going to shake things up around here quite nicely."

"Hey bitch, grab me a beer since you're closer?" Rose asked Bella as soon as she was close enough to be heard.

"Wow, you sure know how to charm someone Rose, " Bella said, handing her the beer she had already ordered, expecting such behavior from Rose."This is Mike, he's been talking me down from the incident you two leaving me with this one's friend incurred."

Handing a second beer to Emmett, she said, "I hope you know how to protect yourself from charming blonds who think too highly of themselves, by the way, because you've certainly found yourself a winner tonight," shooting a smirk at Rose at the end.

Before Rose could make a suitable retort, Emmett said "Oh, I don't know, I think if she wanted to she could be fairly sweet," wrapping an arm around her waist and smiling down at Rose.

"Oh, dear God. We've finally hit the day where Emmett likes a girl enough to spew such saccharine bullshit?" a voice said from behind them. Turning towards the sound, the group discovered Jasper, sporting a tragically disgusted look, with Alice standing beside him, arm still linked in his.

"Whatever, asshole. You know you love it," Emmett informed him, not even bothering to actually look in the direction Jasper's voice was coming from.

"Yeah, that's it," Jasper said, rolling his eyes, disgust still thick in his voice for everyone to hear. Looking towards Bella, he noted Mike standing next to her, and the obvious lack of his other friend. "Where's Backup?" he asked, now slightly confused, as Edward logically should have been all over the girl he'd decided he wanted for the evening but was nowhere to be seen.

"I'm sorry, who?" Bella asked, eyebrows scrunching slightly in confusion. "If you mean your idiot friend, I imagine he's off finding some easy whore to stroke his ego, what with the way I abused it after you four ditched me like the assholes I knew my friends were, but didn't think you two alleged gentlemen would prove to be."

The four the statement was directed at immediately took offense to Bella's words, and above the din of their voices and Mike's laughter the only thing that could be clearly heard was Emmett's "I am most certainly _not_ an asshole!"

As the four continued to attempt to make themselves heard over the other three, Bella felt a hand curve around one hip as a soft voice said in her ear, "What if I decided none of those easy whores you referred to were worth noticing in comparison to you?"

Whipping around so fast her hair flew out behind her, brushing the arm of the man behind her, Bella took a step away from Edward while a sneer blossomed on her face. "Are you kidding me with this shit?" she said, not bothering to even try and keep the contempt from her voice. "Was I not clear enough before? Well let me spell it out for you: _I'm not interested_. Go find one of the many willing skanks floating around just hoping you'll so much as glance in her direction and make all her wildest dreams come true, ok?"

Smirk still inconceivably in place, Edward took a step closer to her, regaining his proximity from before she stepped away, and said, "Mmm, I have always loved a girl who plays hard to get. None of those other girls hold a candle to you, you know. Why would you think I would be interested in them when you're here?"

"Ok, are you stupid, or are you just seriously not listening to me when I speak? Fuck. Off. I'm not interested in sleeping with you because you're the prince. I have no desire to be another notch on your bed post. I'm not going to take my pants off for you because you spout garbage lines that are so unoriginal it's sad. And, I swear to God, if you don't keep your hands to yourself you will lose them. Also, see this area in front of me you seem so keen on being in? It's my personal bubble. Stay the fuck out of it."

Giving Edward one last dirty look, she turned to Mike saying, "Thanks again for letting us crash your party. Get my number from Rose, we'll do coffee or something soon ok?" Then continuing to turn she addressed her friends and their newly discovered men said, "I'll see you girls back at the house, alright? It was really nice meeting you Emmett. Jasper, my name's Bella, since you never got past introducing yourself to Alice. Both of you, don't fuck with them. Bye all," and then left before anyone could say anything back.

Rose, Alice, and Mike simply smirked at each other, having expected such a reaction, based on previous experience on Rose's part, and the tone of their conversations with her on Alice and Mike's. Emmett, had a huge smile on his face, and looked as if all of his dreams had just come true at once.

Jasper, however, having never spoken to the girl before, and having not witnessed the previous scene between her and his friend, simply stood there in a euphoric type of shock.

"What the fuck just happened?" Edward said incredulously.

"Only the greatest thing ever," Emmett said, smile still in place.


	5. Chapter 5

**And we're back for another round. Thanks to my lovely Cara and Shae! This chapter was probably more a skirmish than anything in the War on Commas, which made my darling beta happy.**

**Disclaimer: My Emmett's cooler. Says it all.**

Having stewed the whole trip home and then as she laid awake later on in bed, Bella found she was in no better a mood upon waking the next morning than she had been when she left the party the night before. Deciding to forego her shower for the moment in favor of coffee and some food, she headed down to the kitchen.

Passing a mirror along the way, she couldn't help thinking that if Edward were to see her now, hair falling out of the messy bun she'd put it in the night before, not a trace of makeup to be had, he would be running as fast as possible away from her. It was a thought that brought a small, amused, smile to her face.

Reaching the kitchen, and opening a cabinet to pull out some coffee beans, it occurred to her just how quiet the house was. She couldn't hear anyone moving upstairs, or a shower running or anything. Reasoning her roommates had found other places to spend their evenings after she left, she debated making the full pot anyway, or just enough for herself. After a minute squinting at the pot, trying to figure out how much she would need to grind for just herself, she gave up, measured the normal amount out, and filled the back of the machine with as much water as possible. The girls would amble in eventually, and since she genuinely enjoyed the taste of coffee she had no problem drinking the whole thing herself over the next several hours if it came to that.

As the coffee brewed Bella opened the fridge to see what existed as far as food went. Five minutes later, Rose and Alice found her in exactly that position, bent over, head in the fridge and ass sticking out just begging Rose to smack it, which she immediately did. Shocking the guys she didn't realize had trailed Rose and Alice in, Bella said, "What, is that all you've got? You're getting soft Rose."

"The hell you say," was all she got in response, though she hadn't expected much more than that.

"Is Alice with you? There's like three dozen eggs in here, which I'd really love an explanation about, and some bacon," she informed the kitchen at large before standing up and opening the freezer to see what she could find there. "And breakfast sausage. Patties and links. Intriguing."

"What? I like breakfast," Alice said, sounding slightly defensive.

"It's cool, so do I TinkerHoe," Bella informed her, turning around with a smirk on her face. One that quickly transformed into a look of discomfort when she saw Jasper and Emmett standing just behind Rose and Alice. "Holy shit. Way to not tell me they were here and let me run off at the mouth."

"Oh, you don't need our help to do that, babe," Alice informed her, a smirk of her own in place. Then, eyes narrowing slightly, she abruptly said, "What the hell did you just call me? TinkerHoe?"

Not bothering to respond, Bella just shot Alice a smirk and raised an eyebrow at her before turning back to the fridge to retrieve what she would need to make breakfast for the five of them.

"Don't worry, it's a sign she likes you," she could hear Rose saying as began opening various cabinets in search of the pans and utensils she would need. "She calls me Sluterella on the regular. Has for years now in fact."

Pulling a couple of skillets from where she found them in a cabinet above the stove she could easily feel the glare Alice was sending her way. "Doesn't mean I like it though. TinkerHoe? Really?"

"You'll survive," Bella told her as she placed the skillets on the stove and moved to get a bowl to start cracking eggs into. "I'm just going to do scrambled. It that alright with everyone?" Hearing the foursome's agreement, she started cracking the eggs.

After about four, she turned slightly, and looking in Jasper and Emmett's direction, asked, "How many are you two going to eat? We have three dozen so it's not like there isn't plenty."

"Judging by his size, I'd say Emmett could probably consume a dozen on his own," Alice said, "It probably wouldn't hurt to make like two dozen."

"I would argue, but well, I need my protein this morning," Emmett said, the smirk heavy in his voice, as he winked at Rose.

"Alright, can do," Bella said as she turned back to the counter she was working at. "Why don't you all get some coffee and get the fuck out of my kitchen so I can get our breakfast made." Hearing the four doing just that and beginning to leave she yelled over her shoulder, "And either leave enough for me to have when I'm done or make a fresh pot. I'm not doing everything."

Around an hour later, the five were sitting around the dining room table, with their plates mostly empty, sipping their coffees. There was an air of easy friendship around the room that you wouldn't expect in a group who had known each other for less than twenty-four hours.

"Ok, let me make sure I have this right," Rose could be heard saying, "You two roomed together when you were at school, and you lived next door to the idiot you were with last night?"

"Yeah, not that we actually met him for about two months, but that's the gist of it," Emmett said, switching his coffee to his left hand so he could take Rose's hand with his right. "We all had a lot of fun in those days, playing pranks, mocking Backup, and generally just being teenage boys. Jasper and I were saying just last night that we almost miss it sometimes, but I can't say I'd go back if given the chance."

"You keep calling him that, Backup," Bella noted. "That Edward guy you threw me to the sharks with last night. What's that about?" Then before either man could answer her, her face lit up with a smirk and she said, "Oh God, please tell me it somehow relates to the fact that he's the second son, and therefore his only purpose in life is to be the nation's 'backup' if something were to happen to his brother."

Both men simply stared at Bella for a moment, before glancing at each other in surprise. Finally, Jasper said, "Actually, yes. That's closer to the truth than I think anyone's ever gotten before. I must admit I'm a bit surprised you figured it out so quickly, but at the same time I think it can only bode well for us all that you seem to be on the same wavelength as Emmett and myself."

As Rose asked to hear about some of the pranks the boys had played at school Bella's phone began ringing. Glancing at it she saw an unfamiliar number, and feeling somewhat brave and infinitely more curious she answered it, while getting up to leave the room for privacy.

"... well, suffice it to say, Emmett was a lot smarter than the teachers thought, because of his size, and we used that to our advantage. I'll never forget the look on the Headmaster's face as long as I live though," she heard Jasper saying while Alice and Rose laughed as Bella reentered the room.

"Hey, that was that Mike guy from last night. I'm going to meet him at this little coffee shop around the corner in an hour and a half," she told her friends. Then, turning to Emmett and Jasper, she said "Thanks for joining us for breakfast. If this becomes part of our regularly scheduled activities I may just have to make you my famous French Toast. Have a nice day, I'm sure I'll see you later." With a last smile for the room as a whole, she headed upstairs to get ready.

Had she waited a minute before heading up the stairs, she might have heard Jasper let out a low whistle before saying to Emmett, "Coffee with Mike? Backup's not going to like this. You want to tell him or can I?" with the just faintest hints of amusement in his voice.

YNK

"I wonder how bad his hangover is this morning," Jasper said as he and Emmett got out of his car once they had arrived at Edward's house.

"I thought I saw him shooting Patron at one point, so I'm thinking it'll be one wildebeest shy of the Mufasa death scene in the Lion King." Getting out of the car himself, Emmett glanced briefly towards the sky before getting an evil smirk and saying "I think all this glorious sun will do it ... wonders."

Not even bothering to comment on the crazy that came out of his friend's mouth initially, being far too used to such things after all these years, Jasper merely grinned back, saying, "Oh, most definitely. Nothing like lots of overly bright sunshine to cure a hangover."

With that they headed for the front door, Emmett pulling out his key along the way so they could let themselves in. Looking around the empty entrance hall, they noted the lack of any of the usual servants. Normally, by almost twelve noon, the maids would have been scurrying about getting their cleaning done, and delicious scents would have been wafting up from the kitchen, where Edward's cook was busy creating a masterpiece for lunch. "Guess someone didn't want to be disturbed this morning," Jasper noted absently, with a small smirk still in place. "Too bad for him we're not on his father's payroll and don't give a damn."

Heading up the stairs, careful not to make a sound, the boys quickly made their way to Edward's room. Throwing open the door, Emmett said in a booming voice "What a glorious day today is. Jasper, get those blinds open, without the appropriate lighting this room could easily be a mausoleum."

Edward let out a groan, as Jasper did just that, and began cursing his friends. "What the fuck is wrong with you two? Go the fuck away, I'm not up to dealing with your bullshit this morning. Just close my damned curtains and get the fuck out already."

"No can do, I'm afraid," Jasper informed him, enjoying the sight of his friend's drink induced pain. "It's almost noon, it's a beautiful day, and we met some very lovely ladies last night, who knew just how to treat a man."

This prompted nothing but another groan from the bed, as Edward attempted to bury his head underneath his pillow.

"Actually, Jasper," Emmett began, approaching Edward's bed and beginning to pull everything off it so he'd have no choice but to get up, "Now that you mention it, I seem to remember only the two of _us_ doing that. I can't help but remember a rather feisty brunette handing Backup's ass to him last night. And not once, but _twice_ no less."

"Fuck. You." was all he got in return, as Jasper smirked.

"You know, now that you mention I do remember something like that. A lovely young lady who seemingly felt nothing but contempt for our royal friend here."

"If by 'royal friend' you mean 'royal pain in our ass of a friend' then yes, that's precisely what I'm referring to," Emmett agreed, before adding, "And I do believe she preferred Mike to Backup last night. As if Backup could have sank any lower after she threatened to rip his hands off."

Finally sitting up in bed, Edward regarded his friends balefully. "Ok, jokes aside, what the fuck happened last night? It was like I stepped into the Twilight Zone or something. Did I really get shot down? She was just playing hard to get right?"

Deciding to be nice for the moment, Jasper wandered over and sat on the edge of Edward's bed saying, "I don't think she was, man. Judging by her behavior this morning at breakfast, I think she's genuinely uninterested."

Considering this for a minute, Edward's head suddenly snapped up, prompting him to clench his eyes shut until the pain of his rash action passed. Once it had, glaring at his friends, he said, "What do you mean her behavior at breakfast? What the fuck were you two up to?"

"Oh, relax," Emmett said, laughing slightly, "We brought Rose and Alice back and got invited to stay for breakfast. It was nothing exciting."

"She's a hell of a cook though," Jasper said absentmindedly. "I can't wait to try her French Toast she mentioned."

"Yeah, me either," Emmett was quick to agree, "I'm quite certain it's going to be delicious. We _need_ to make Saturday morning breakfast with them part of the regularly scheduled activities man, I'm telling you."

"Wait, wait, wait," Edward said, bring the other two's attention back to himself, "If you had breakfast with them, what are you two doing here?"

"Oh, well, can't we be concerned with how our friend's holding up after his night last night?" Emmett asked trying to sound innocent. The look Edward sent him made it all too clear that he wasn't buying it. "Okay, fine. Bella left to go meet Mike for a coffee date, and we figured it was as good a time as any to head out. We'll be seeing Alice and Rose later and we needed to shower and such."

"Oh, that makes sense I sup ... WHAT?" Edward said, before suddenly realizing all of what Emmett had said to him, voice rising considerably on his last word. "What do mean, coffee _date_ with _Mike_?" he asked, still yelling slightly.

Trying not to laugh, Jasper said, "Just that. She left ..."

"Looking smoking," Emmett interrupted.

"Looking smoking," Jasper conceded, waving a hand in Emmett's direction, "And we figured that was our cue to head out."

"What do you mean looking smoking? Like date smoking? Or last night at the party smoking, or what?" Edward said, voice still high pitched.

"Oh, definitely date smoking," Emmett said, doing a better job of hiding his amusement than Jasper was, who had retreated to the record wall to "peruse Edward's music collection" so Edward wouldn't realize they were completely having him on. "Lots of skin, those knee high boots that are so popular lately. She was definitely dressed to ... impress let's say."

Glancing towards Jasper, Emmett saw him smirking in his direction and sent him a quick wink while Edward was looking out the window contemplating the situation.

"Do you know what coffee shop they were meeting at?" Edward asked, barely restrained anger clear in his voice.

Struggling now to keep a straight face, Emmett said, "Oh, yeah. It was that little hole in the wall on Fourth. It's right by the girls' house it turns out."

Jumping out of bed and making a beeline for his closet, Edward said, "I'm putting a stop to this shit once and for all. Playing hard to get is one thing, but going out with fucking Mike Newton is entirely different, and I am not standing for it."

Jasper, having made his way across the room to Emmett's side, let a smirk finally show on his face, while saying, "Things are about to get interesting."

"More like hilarious," Emmett said back, a smirk of his own becoming larger as he heard more of his friend's frustrated rumbling issue from the closet. "Let the games begin."


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: Sorry about the wait, I went out of town with the family and didn't have internet so I couldn't get it to the beta-love in time.**

**Thanks as always to Shae for pre-reading and general awesomeness, and to Cara for putting up with my inability to use a comma correctly!**

**Sadly, still not mine.**

As Alice and Rose were saying their goodbyes to Emmett and Jasper, Bella came downstairs, carrying a pair of heels she had yet to put on.

"You look cute," Alice said, looking over at her, "but are you really wearing that out on a date?"

Hearing this, Rose turned in Bella's direction and looked her up and down, taking in her outfit. After a beat, she said, "No, that's not anywhere near what she'd wear on a date. That's 'I'm meeting a friend.' Completely different.

"Alice is right though," she added after another once over, "you do look cute. I'll probably want to steal that top at some point."

Sharing a look of confusion with Jasper, Emmett asked, "How can you tell the difference in her outfits?"

Turning back to him, Rose explained, "Well, for one thing, I've known her most of our lives. I know what she'd wear on a date. More to point, I know what she _wouldn't_ wear on a date."

Still looking confused, Jasper voiced his own question. "Okay, so," pausing, he scrunched his eyebrows together as he attempted to figure out how to say what he was thinking, "how is that _not_ date clothing? Like you said, she looks cute, she has heels in her hand, makeup's on and hair's done. What's missing?"

All three girls burst out laughing at the naivety of the question. Bella, being the first to calm down enough to do so, explained. "Aside from the complete lack of skin I'm showing? I'm wearing a long-sleeved tee-shirt and jeans. Yes, they're skinny jeans, and yes, I'm going to wear heels, but this is just normal, everyday wear. The neckline, while it's wide and shows my shoulders, completely covers my chest. Yes, the shirt itself isn't loose as such, but it's really just comfortable. I would wear this outfit around the house, or to class or something, you know."

Both boys still had perplexed looks on their faces, but after a moment they both just shrugged and said, "Sure, why not."

With another quick laugh, Bella stepped into her shoes before saying she'd see everyone later and heading out for the coffee shop. As she did so, Emmett and Jasper shared an evil smile that went unnoticed by the girls.

YNK

Upon reaching the coffee shop, Bella discovered she'd arrived before Mike and snagged them a table after ordering a latte for herself. As she waited for Mike to arrive she did some people watching. There was a couple a few tables away who were clearly still in the beginning stages of their relationship, but very much in like with each other. The pair kept stealing glances at each other when they thought no one was looking, the girl was laughing at almost everything the boy said to her, and the look on the boy's face said all too obviously that he didn't know what he had done to be so lucky as to have the girl with him.

At a table by the wall sat an older couple. He was reading the paper while drinking his coffee, she was reading a book and drinking tea.

A group of girls were a bit further along, giggling over something, instead of doing the work they had brought with them. Typical behavior, given the age, and yet Bella couldn't help thinking that by that age she'd been much more studious. Or was it that by their age she'd begun dating Embry and maintaining perfect grades had been a requirement in order to see him?

With a slight, nostalgic, smile on her face, Bella looked back towards the door, checking for Mike. Catching sight of him in the crowd coming through the door, she threw an arm in the air, waving, to catch his attention. Seeing her, Mike indicated he was going to grab himself something and be right over. As Mike approached her with a cup of coffee in hand, Bella had to hide a smile at his clothes. She was completely unsurprised to see him in a pair of perfectly fitted jeans and a light blue button down under a cream colored sweater. While she couldn't see them, she was prepared to bet his brown dress shoes matched his belt and wallet.

Letting a real smile spread over her face, she said, "Hello, stranger. How's your morning?"

Settling in across from her, Mike let out a rueful chuckle, "The morning itself has gone well enough, but thank goodness I hire cleaners to deal with the aftermath of my parties. My downstairs is a wreck. Not surprising, but disconcerting upon first sight all the same. How are you?"

Smiling, Bella related her breakfast with her friends, Emmett, and Jasper. As she was winding down, she noticed Mike was making a face that she was unable to read. Smiling when she asked, he answered, "I'm just surprised Edward didn't find a way to tag along with them, is all. He's very ... persistent ... shall we say."

"Yes, I suspected as much given his second attempt at wooing me last night," Bella said, scoffing. "But he wasn't with the other two this morning. I got the impression that Rose and Alice went home with them last night and their all showing up when they did was a stroke of unbelievable timing and luck."

"True," Mike said, agreeing. "Although, I don't know how much luck was really involved. Those three tend to plan and plot so it was probably intentional. I'm inclined to think that Emmett and Jasper simply didn't tell Edward what they were up to, which implies that for whatever reason they weren't planning to include him in their afternoon activities." Taking a drink of his tea, Mike thought about the situation for another minute before saying, "I wonder what kind of game they're all playing in relation to each other."

"I'm sure I have no idea," Bella said, also thinking about it. "They did make breakfast a lot of fun though, so that was a bonus."

After a few minutes of light chatting, and drinking their respective tea and latte, Bella said, "So, what's the deal with Edward anyway? I mean seriously, he's a complete tool and everyone seems to eat it right up. I get that he's the prince, but still."

Laughing, Mike nodded his agreement to her view of his friend, and said, "While all of that is generally true, you only saw the clubbing, picking up women, out with his buddies to have a good time persona. There's actually a great deal more to him. You might be surprised what you find if you take the time to get to know him."

"Oh, I'm sure there's more, like a nasty STD," Bella told him, sounding as if she didn't believe for a minute that Edward had a single redeeming characteristic to him.

"I realize last night doesn't paint him in the best light, but do you really think Emmett and Jasper would have stood by him all these years if that's all he was?" Mike asked in response, eyebrows rising slightly at the end.

Before Bella had a chance to answer him, they heard a slamming sound as the door to the coffee shop was thrown open. Looking towards the door, they were greeted with the sight of a very annoyed looking Edward who was glaring at the coffee shop as a whole and sweeping his eyes back and forth as though looking for someone.

"Well, this should be interesting," Mike said, having an idea of why Edward was there.

Cutting her eyes to Mike, Bella began to ask him what he meant, but before she could complete her sentence Edward spotted the two of them, letting out a small growl as he began to move in their direction. "Um, what the fuck is he coming over here for?" she asked instead, looking incredulous.

"I suspect, he plans to rip me apart and claim you as his own. Which is why I said it'll be interesting, as I somehow don't anticipate you putting up with it," Mike told her, doing a poor job of maintaining a straight face as Edward was almost to them.

"What the fuck is going on here?" Edward asked upon reaching their table, in an ominously quiet voice. He wasn't looking at either of them specifically, but seemed to be glaring down at the table as a whole. After a moment of silence he glanced sharply at Mike and then Bella, his eyes narrowing on her, he let out a soft growl, and said, "Seriously, what in the fuck is this? You're out with _him_? I tried not once but twice to get your attention last night, and instead all I get is you ripping into me, and yet this tool talks to you for a few minutes and now you're on a date with him? What the hell?"

Raising an eyebrow at his rant, Bella proceeded to give him a dirty look and take a drink of her latte. After letting the silence stretch on to the point of being uncomfortable for both the men, she let out a derisive snort, and said, "What this is, is none of your business, for one thing. What you also fail to realize is that when your chosen victim for the evening doesn't find you just completely amazing and doesn't melt into a puddle of lovestruck goo, you need to change your tactics. What works with your mindless bimbos is probably the last thing that will work on a girl who sees through your rich boy, prince, cocksure, king of it all bullshit. And as for who I am or am not out on a date with, why do you even care? So you didn't get anywhere with me, that doesn't mean no one else will either."

Edward stared at her in shock for a minute, "This is un-fucking-real." Glancing around the coffee shop, he noticed that they had drawn the attention of all the other patrons. Glancing to Mike, he noticed the man was clearly amused by the situation, and said, "You and I are going to have a nice long chat, very soon." Then, looking back at Bella said, "The fact is, when I decide I want a girl, I get her. Your refusal has done nothing more than make this a challenge, and there is nothing in the world I love more than a good challenge. That being said, enjoy your coffee, I'll see you soon." So saying, he turned and stalked back out of the shop, plotting his next meeting with the brown-haired beauty he left behind him.

"Is he serious?" Bella asked Mike after watching the door close behind Edward. "What the hell?"

With a slight sigh, Mike gave her a bland smile, and said, "Oh, he's quite serious. And your life is about to get quite entertaining for the rest of us. Not for you, though. I suspect before long you're going to be begging for mercy, he's ruthless when it comes to getting what he wants. Good luck, lovey."


	7. Chapter 7

**To start off, so sorry about the delay! School has started and it was a bit harder to find time to write than I anticipated. That being said, I'm pretty sure I'm going to drop back to updating every other week. I will still be posting on Tuesdays though, that won't change.**

**Thanks go to the wonderful Cara, who has almost won her war of the commas, and my lovely Shae for prereading.**

**Also, due to my being full of fail, I realized I have never said this. THANK YOU ALL so very much who review! Your reviews mean so much to me, knowing that people are reading this AND liking it is amazing to me, and it makes me smile every time my phone vibrates with a review alert email. So, again, THANK YOU ALL!**

**If you aren't familiar with the flash I reference in the beginning of the chapter the link is at the bottom.**

"Ok, just tell us what happened ..." Rose was saying, a soothing note to her voice.

"In English, too, preferably," Alice interrupted, shooting Bella a quick smile.

"Yes," Rose quickly agreed, "in English. Take a deep breath and start at the beginning. You were having coffee and talking to Mike when Edward came in. Everything else was just one big jumbled rant."

Closing her eyes, Bella took a deep breath, and then pulled in another for good measure. Feeling reasonably calm again, she opened one eye to peek out at the two girls standing before her. After another second she let out all the air in her lungs, opened her second eye, and began. "Ok, basically he comes in all 'WTF, mate?' and spazzing because I'm out with Mike, but turned him down. Apparently, this is just unfathomable to him."

"Well, from what Emmett and Jasper have said, your turning him down was a first. Even you can admit that his behavior isn't completely unexpected given that," Alice told her.

"Ok, yes, that's true. Doesn't make it any less obnoxious though," Bella answered with a roll of her eyes.

"Never said it did, sweetie. Anyway, back to the story."

"Right, well he was busy being the kangaroos in Australia, and ... what, Alice?" Bella began, before noticing the confused look on Alice's face.

"The kangaroos in Australia? What the fuck does that even mean?" Looking to Rose, she continued, "Does that make any sense to you?"

Shaking her head at her friends, Rose said, "It does, but only because I'm familiar with the End of the World flash. I'll show it to you later, but the part she's referencing is, the world gets blown up by nukes and everyone's dead, except Australia, they're all 'WTF, mate?' It makes no sense out of context, just go with it."

With both eyebrows so high on her forehead they were in danger of disappearing behind her bangs, Alice merely nodded and motioned for Bella to continue.

Laughing slightly at the look she'd just been given, Bella finished her story. "So, I then told him that his usual tactics wouldn't work on a girl like me, who saw though his bullshit. I think I said something to the effect of his not getting anywhere with me didn't preclude anyone else from doing so, which he apparently took as a challenge and declared his intention of 'winning' before turning and leaving the shop. It was both the most bizarre and most infuriating conversation of my life. The boy is a moron."

"Aren't they all?" Rose said with a laugh. "Actually," she continued after a pause, "I don't know how much of his stupidity is real, and how much of it is that you've basically put him in left field and he's struggling to figure things out. Not that it's any kind of excuse, but if he only knows one thing, being girls falling all over him, your not doing so has to be really bizarre to him and he probably has no idea what's going on right now."

"Mm, yeah that's a good point," Alice said, head nodding ever so slightly. "It's kind of disgusting to watch, but at the same time he _is_ the prince. Of course every girl, except you of course, who's presented with the opportunity is going to jump at it."

The face Bella made at her prompted Alice to say, "Granted most of the girls he usually goes after have less sense than this counter top, but the point is, they all fall all over him and that's all he's ever known."

"Ok, yes I see your point," Bella said with a huff and a roll of her eyes, "but seriously, it's not going to happen because he'll never change. I really hope he figures that out quickly."

As Bella looked down into the mug she'd poured her latte in upon getting home, Alice and Rose looked at each other, a short, silent conversation passing between them.

"So, if he were to change," Rose began, a thoughtful look on her face, "would you give him a chance?"

Looking up, eyebrows furrowed in thought, Bella asked, "What do you mean?"

"If he grew up a bit, because really I think that's all he needs to do, what then? I don't think it's some serious character flaw. I think that ... everything has always come easily for him. He's a spoiled rich kid, which isn't surprising as he's the prince, who's accustomed to getting his own way because, really, who's going to tell him no?"

"I don't know. I suppose he'd have to find a way to prove to me that it was legitimate interest. That he wasn't still pursuing me because I was the only one who said no. That I wasn't a conquest of sorts, or something to prove, you know? Because, he is attractive. I can admit that. Right up until he opened his mouth last night, all I could think was 'Holy fuck, who is that?' Course, then he ended that quickly enough. But if he was genuinely interested in me, for me, I just might." After drinking some of her latte and looking out the window for a minute, Bella added, "The thing is, when I say I'd give him a chance, I mean more than I'd fuck him. That's part of the issue. I think he just wants to have sex, and I'm not about to put out on the first date. He'd have to prove he's interested in being with me and not just being in my pants."

"Well, honey," Alice said with a small smile for her, "in order to figure that out, you're going to have to spend time with him. You have to give him the chance to prove himself to you. And most importantly, while you need to stand up for yourself, you cannot fly off the handle at everything he says. It's a fine line, I know, but you have to learn what to let go, and what to tell him off for. And like I said, you can't figure that out if you won't spend any time with him."

YNK

Edward was pacing back and forth in his living room when someone knocked on his door. After a minute, the door to the room opened revealing his butler, who informed him of the arrival of his friend. Expecting it to be either Jasper or Emmett, he nodded his assent to their being let in. Dropping onto his couch and letting his head fall into his head hands, he said "I may have fucked up," when he heard the door close.

"I think it's more than may have, but I also think you can fix it. Which is why I am here."

Flying up from the couch, Edward turned quickly, seeing not his friends as expected but instead Mike standing in the room, and let out a soft growl of annoyance. "What the fuck are you doing here?"

"Listen, before you decide to kill me, there is something I think you should be aware of," Mike told him, not moving from his spot by the door, feeling that the better part of valor in this instance was not putting himself closer to harm. "I'm not interested in Bella. Not the way you are. She's lovely, certainly, but she's not my type. And I do not believe she is at all interested in me that way either, so you have nothing to worry about from me."

Edward stared hard at Mike for a minute before letting out a grunt of acknowledgement and turning to flop back on to the couch and resuming his previous position. "Ok, then what?"

"Like I said, I believe you can fix it. But, I am not going to help you until we talk, and only if what you say is what I want to hear." Mike told him, finally leaving the door, and coming to sit in an armchair near the couch Edward was occupying.

"What?" Edward said, turning his head enough to see the other man.

"It's simple, Edward. She is an amazing girl, and she does not deserve to be submitted to your usual bullshit with woman. If you're only interested in getting her into bed to prove that you can have any woman you want, I won't help you. However, if it was something more that you wanted with her, well now that is something I believe I can assist you with."

"You honestly think I would be this upset over last night if I was just interested in the sex?" Edward asked, sounding offended.

"Given your track record, do you blame me?" Mike answered with a smile. When Edward didn't answer, Mike said, "Edward, you're not known for your successful relationships. If anything, you are known for not having relationships. You take a different girl home every night. You have never been seen with the same girl twice. Ever. That speaks pretty loudly. You must see that."

"Ok, fine. Yes, you have a point," Edward said, reluctance obvious in his voice. "Bella, though, she's different. It's not about the sex with her, I don't think. Don't get me wrong, I definitely am interested in the sex, but this morning Jasper and Emmett ate breakfast with her and her two friends, and I found myself rather jealous that they had spent time with her. That she had cooked for them. I want to get know her, beyond the superficial why she's here, what she is or did study at university stuff. I want to know the story behind that scar she has on her wrist, what her parents are like, I want to hear her laugh. I want to be the one _making_ her laugh. It's ... I don't know really. I've never experienced this before."

Smiling, Mike told him, "You like her. And, you respect her. That is the difference. She's special, and you recognize that. I am glad that you do, because if you had not, I would not have helped you."

"So, you will then?" Edward asked, sounding hopeful.

"Oh, yes. I find myself quite fond of her, and I think you could make her quite happy, but like she said this morning, you are going to have to change tactics with her. Also, I suspect you are going to have to prove to her what you just told me, but through actions rather than words. They do speak so much louder after all."

"Anything," Edward said, "Tell me what to do and I'll do it. How do I prove myself to her?"

"I am warning you, here and now, before we set out on this, it will not be easy, but then, what worth having ever is?"

**Flash Link: http:/www(dot)endofworld(dot)net/**


	8. Chapter 8

**Ok, yes, I know, I suck horrendously. All I can say is I'm sorry, law school kicked my ass last semester, and I will do my best to never let it go this long again without an update. On that note, thank you to everyone who favorited and alerted the story during the wait, and for the lovely reviews, they kicked my ass into gear once break started! **

**Standard adoration, love and devotion for my beta Cara and my lovely Shae for putting up with my ridiculousness and the continued efforts in the war on commas!**

**Sadly, I still own nothing you recognize here, because if I did, there would have been a lot more Emmett in the series and a lot less emo moping all around!**

**Hope you like it!**

"To father's seeing reason," Jasper said, raising his glass to toast Emmett's good fortune.

Touching his glass to Jasper's, Emmett smiled before saying, "More like to miracles no one saw coming." Taking a large swallow, Emmett set his glass on the table, but didn't let go of it. "God, I still can't believe this, I feel like such a fucking girl saying this but it feels like I'm in the middle of a dream and I'm going to wake up to find he's not _really_ going to pay, ya know?"

Tilting his head to one side, Jasper eyed his friend for a minute before sighing. "No, I get how you would feel like that. If I were in your shoes, I would probably be thinking the exact same thing." Shaking his head, and letting out a short laugh, he added, "If I were you, I'd get the first tuition check now before he can change his mind. God knows, the man won't let his son be a quitter."

"We have a 'meeting' about it tomorrow. Whatever that means." Rolling his eyes, Emmett just leaned back in his chair and grinned.

"So, the major question," Jasper started, "where you thinking about going?"

"You would cut right to the chase, wouldn't you?" Sighing, Emmett dragged a hand through his hair before answering, "Ya know, I'm really not sure. I need to look into some local schools, figure out what kind of scores I would need to achieve on tests and all that. And, I need to figure out what this whole business with Rosalie means." A small smile lifting his lips, Emmett took another drink.

"You think it could mean something, then?" Jasper asked, sounding curious more than doubtful.

Mulling it over in his head, Emmett finally said, "I think it's possible that it could if given the opportunity. I'm really not sure. I know I _want_ to see her later today. And again tomorrow, and even the day after that. I know I've _never_ felt like this about any woman, ever. She's different from the usual girls I pick up too. Yeah, I got some last night, I mean come on look at me, but I'm pretty sure if she'd said 'no' I would have been ok with it. I don't know man, I have to think if the girl can make me feel this way she's worth getting to know."

"Of course, if she's playing a role in your decision making, the fact that she _is_ American may also be worth considering," Jasper pointed out. "It would require more effort on your part to go to an American school, sure, but it would also give her time home with her family, it would allow you both to figure your relationship out more completely. If you decide you want to be with her in the long term, it would be worth the extra effort, right?"

"Oh, of course. And admittedly, there's something appealing about knowing I've been accepted to a school on my own merits and not because I'm a McCarty," Emmett said in response. Then, flashing a grin across the table, "What about you and Alice?"

The smile that rose to Jasper's lips was all the answer Emmett needed, and he immediately started laughing. "Oh you poor bastard," he said, still chuckling, "you're in deep. Good luck."

"Thanks, although I think Backup needs it far more than I do," Jasper said, still smiling.

"Ahh, yes," Emmett said, his grin turning to smirk, "now that is going to an interesting situation, and hilarious. I'm quite looking forward to watching this play out." From Emmett's pocket came a loud buzzing noise. Rolling his eyes at Jasper, he fished out his phone, and after seeing the number on the screen he said, "It's the First Lady, wonder what she wants."

"Momma Cullen!" He boomed, once he'd placed the phone to his ear. After a moment he mouthed the word dinner to Jasper, raising his eyebrows at him in question, and after receiving a nod from him said into the phone, "Yeah, of course we'll be there. You know we wouldn't pass on an opportunity to enjoy some of Francois' cooking."

Looking up when Emmett waved a hand at him, Jasper saw a twinkle in his friend's eye that he knew would bode well for his entertainment that evening, but possibly not so well for others. As if he knew what he was thinking, Emmett flashed him an evil grin, before saying, "Momma Cullen, what would you say to us bringing some ladies to dinner with us tonight? The three of us met some very interesting women last night, and, based on our previous conversation, Jasper and I feel quite certain they're going to prove very important."

Giving Jasper a quick thumbs up to show he'd gotten the go ahead, he said, "Awesome, we'll see you tonight. I'll let the girls know it's going to be informal. Yup, love you too, bye."

YNK

"Hey, co-hoes," could be heard coming from the direction of Rose's bedroom.

"I don't care," was the response from the room across the hall. Immediately followed by the muffled sound of a phone ringing inside it.

From the kitchen, Alice asked Bella, "Did she really just say co-hoes?"

"You'll get used to it, promise," Bella said with a laugh, "she either wants us to go out somewhere again tonight, or Emmett wants us all to get together for something. Are you down with either of those options?"

"Um, I'm down with seeing Jasper, but I don't think I'm feeling another night out somewhere."

"Ok, cool. I'll see what she wants and fill you in." Saying this, Bella flipped her phone shut, pushed herself up off the floor of her closet, and headed across the hall, tossing her phone on her bed as she went. "What do you want, bitch?"

"Dinner with the guys? At Backup's parents' place?" Rose said, shifting the phone away from her mouth.

"As in at a palace?" Bella asked, eyes going wide.

"That's usually how it works when you're having dinner with a prince's parents. Emmett says be polite, dressy-casual, they'll love that you're not falling for their son's charms, and they're pretty cool for being royalty."

"Uh, Alice said yes, but I didn't know about the royals part when I asked. I'm cool as long as they don't expect me to kiss the twit's ass, let me check with her real quick."

Walking back to her room, Bella grabbed her phone, dialed Alice's number and headed back across to Rose's room. "Hey, it's dinner with all the guys, but it's with the royals. Are you still in?" she asked as she walked over and plopped down into the chair in the corner. "Um, dressy-casual, I guess. Yeah. Pft, fat chance, besides Emmett says they'll like the fact that I don't give a shit he's a prince. Ok cool. Let me ask, hold on." Looking towards Rose, Bella asked, "What time will they be here? I assume they're picking us up?"

"Uh, time frame?" Rose asked Emmett, then relayed, "They'll get us by 6:00, dinner's served at 7:00 so that'll give us plenty of time."

"They'll be here at 6:00. Seriously, it's like 2:00, I think four hours is plenty of time to get ready." Letting out a laugh, Bella rolled her eyes at Rose, "Ok, whatever floats your boat TinkerHoe. We're in Rose's room if you need assistance. Later." With that she hung up her phone and told Rose they were both in.

"Yeah, we're all in," Rose said, going back to her conversation while Bella glanced around her room, checking out what she'd gotten set up and unpacked so far. "Does Edward know we're coming?" she asked, then laughed at his answer. "Are you going to tell him? Ha, poor kid. Ok, I'm going to get going, but I'll see you later. I can't wait either. Bye"

Hearing Rose put her phone down, Bella glanced over at Rose and said with a knowing smile, "You like him."

Smiling back, Rose said, "I really do. I don't know if it's going to work long term, but for now, I think he's just what I need to make this trip that little bit better."

YNK

"That's what you're wearing?" Rose said, looking at Bella as she walked down the stairs.

"Eat me," was the only response she received.

"No, seriously, I like it. That shirt looks awesome on you. Hello, Bella's boobs, the Prince won't be able to keep his eyes off of you," Rose said, smirking at the end.

With a roll of her eyes, Bella stepped into a pair of black heels. "I know my boobs look awesome, stop speaking to them as if they're a separate entity. If you think I look so good, what was with the snark?"

"Um, since when do you wear yellow?" Rose said by way of explanation.

"Since I saw the shirt and thought it was gorgeous regardless of color?" Looking around, Bella then asked, "Where's Alice hiding? It's 6:00, the guys should be here any second."

As soon as she'd gotten the words out of her mouth, the sound of feet running across the hall came from over their heads, along with a shout of "I'm coming, calm your hormones, woman." Coming to a halt at the bottom of the stairs, Alice gave the other two a smirk and said, "Well, we certainly look hot."

Taking a second look at Bella, she added, "Ahh, I see the girls are out to play. Trying to see if you can give the Prince a boner in front of his parents?"

The sound of a knock on the door prevented Bella from doing more than shooting her friends a nasty look, and flipping them the bird as she turned to open it. Finding Emmett standing there, she said, "Thank God, you can save me from the she-beast you're so interested in," and proceeded to walk out the door to the town car waiting in front of the house.

YNK

"Yes, well, not all of us can be so fortunate as to be you Carlisle, so back off," was the first thing heard by the group of five as they entered the sitting room the butler had shown them to.

"Edward," an elegant woman seated on a couch with a young girl said, "please don't argue with your brother in front of guests. It's unbecoming." Seeing her son's mouth drop after discovering Bella was among the group that had entered, she added, "And close your mouth, please. We don't want to look like a fish now do we?"

At her fish comment, the young girl promptly start giggling, causing the woman to smile indulgently at her, and wink imperceptibly.

Snapping his mouth shut, Edward said nothing before walking away from his brother and the man's wife.

Turning back to the five, the woman said "Emmett, Jasper, it's so lovely to see you. Please, introduce us to your lovely friends," while walking over to them, and kissing each man on the cheek in turn.

"Of course," Emmett said. Turning, he introduced Rose, the smile on his face telling everyone she was the one he had brought specifically, Alice and Bella.

"It's lovely to meet you all, and please, call me Elizabeth," she told them, hugging each in turn. "I may be the queen, but in the comfort of my own home, I prefer not to stand on ceremony.

"Dinner should be ready in about half an hour. In the mean time would you all like drinks?" After everyone agreed that they would indeed like a drink, Elizabeth motioned to a servant to come forward and serve them all wine.

Once everyone had a glass in hand, Elizabeth turned toward the corner the men had congregated in and, with a sparkle in her eye, said, "Emmett, darling, when was the last time you visited with Francois? I'm sure he would love to chat with you, why don't you head into the kitchens and visit with him for a bit?"

"Momma Cullen, that is a wonderful idea," Emmett responded, eyes lighting up at the prospect. "Will you be ok if I leave you here for a bit Rosalie?" he then asked, garnering a raised eyebrow and shared look of interest between Elizabeth and Carlisle's wife Esme.

"Yes, of course," Rose told him with a reassuring smile, "if all else fails, I have Bella mocking to pass time."

Laughing, Emmett came over to kiss her on the cheek. As he did, he heard Bella muttering about hating the other woman, only making him laugh harder. "I'll see you lovely ladies in a bit then," he said, heading for the door.

Looking back over his shoulder, he said to the little girl, Edward's sister Jane, "Shortstack, I expect to hear how your piano lessons are going later." Throwing her a roguish wink, he added, "I prefer Mozart to Chopin, by the way."

With a shake of his head, Jasper put his glass on a low table nearby, and he too headed for the door, saying, "I should probably go keep an eye on Emmett and that bottomless pit he calls a stomach, or the rest of us won't have anything to eat come dinner." He stopped just long enough to copy Emmett and kiss Alice on the cheek.

After he had left the room, Elizabeth fixed her sons with an expectant gaze. When a couple of minutes passed without them getting the point, she sighed softly, saying, "Boys, I think, if Jasper needs to get between Emmett and our meal, he'll need your help to keep the big lug in line. Why don't you join them?"

Not giving Edward a chance to speak, Carlisle agreed to do so, and headed out himself, leaving Edward no choice but to follow.

Looking at Rose, Bella pretended a take a sip of her wine, and said, "Well, this is about to get interesting."

Rose let out a soft snicker in response, audible to no one other than Bella.

"Now that they're gone," Elizabeth said, smiling at the other women, "Are you girls hungry? I hid some appetizers for us to enjoy while we get to know each other."

After retrieving a plate each, Alice, Bella and Rose settled onto one of the many couches set about the room, while Esme, Elizabeth, and Jane, sat on one placed across from them. Giving them a minute to get comfortable, Esme asked, "So, how did you all _really_ meet those three? Emmett and Jasper couldn't do anything more than laugh when I asked them earlier."

At the question, Bella let out a groan, while Alice glanced away, trying not to smile, and Rosalie closed her eyes and scrunched up her face attempting to keep from giggling as she so desperately wanted to.

"Judging from their reaction, the answer should be a good one," Elizabeth said, an anticipatory smile rising to her face as she leaned ever so slightly closer to them.

"Readers' Digest version," Bella began, not looking the other woman in the face, "We were all at the same party last night."

"Yes," Rose said, laughter clear in her voice, "and Bella rather abused your son's ego while we were there."

"You know," Esme began, "I heard an interesting story about Edward and a brunette while I was out this morning." Setting her plate aside, she too leaned imperceptibly closer. "You wouldn't happen to know anything about that now would you?"

Alice, the only one who didn't choke slightly at her words, said, "Well, I suppose that would depend entirely on what you heard."

Smiling back, Esme said, "Well, admittedly I do not have all the details. However, first, I heard something about Edward storming into this little coffee shop and making quite the scene with a lovely young woman with dark brown hair, and one of his friends. I can't remember which, but it was ..." trailing off she looked to Elizabeth, saying, "that blond one, who's parties the three of them always attend. I know his name but ..."

"Might it have been Mike Newton?" Bella asked quietly.

Looking back towards her, Esme said, "Yes. That's it. How did you know?" sounding astonished.

"Brunette he spazzed on in the coffee shop this morning?" Raising her hand Bella made an embarrassed face, while Rose pointed both hands in her direction and Alice lifted her empty right hand to point over and down at Bella.

"But why was he yelling at you?" Jane asked, before realizing what she'd done and turning red.

Smiling reassuringly at the girl, Bella said, "Well, I suspect it had something to do with the fact that I turned him down last night, twice, and then went to coffee with his friend. He didn't seem at all impressed by it."

At her words, Elizabeth's eyes went wide and her smile widened, while Jane began giggling, and Esme gasped, before saying, "Please tell me that's true. You really shot him down?" At Bella's nod she continued, "Oh that is perfect. I think you may be the first person to ever tell him no. I knew I liked you."

Noticing Bella had set down her plate which was still half full, Rosalie said, "Bella what are you doing? You haven't dropped anything yet, your boobs must be getting hungry?"

"Really?" Bella said, glaring at her friend, while the women looked at each other in confusion and Jane's eyes got wide.

"Sorry," Rose said, looking at the three, "Bella and I have this running joke ..."

"Don't include me in your insanity," Bella interrupted.

"Fine," she said, rolling her eyes, "_I_ have a running joke at Bella's expense about how her boobs are so big they're like their own separate entity. I pretend to talk to them, ask her if they're hungry or thirsty when she spills something on herself, that sort of thing."

"Yes, and I hate it," Bella was quick to assure the three.

"I really don't know why," Alice said, with a laugh, "it's all in good fun. And even you have to admit, the voices the guys were doing for them in the car were hilarious." Given she was laughing along with everyone else, it was clear she did indeed agree.

"Dear," Elizabeth began, taking a deep breath to calm herself, "would you mind terribly, that is, would it embarrass you if we were to address your boobs at dinner? In front of my son? He's convinced I'm this fun-sucking boring woman, and the look that is certain to appear on his face would be priceless."

"Ya know," Bella said, eyes sparkling with laughter, "I don't think that would be a problem at all."


End file.
